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The Story:

Each day was like putting together a puzzle, without knowing what picture it formed. He knew he had all the pieces. He knew he would figure it out in time. But there was no guide to help him, no end goal or instructions—only daily guesses.

Raising a baby girl without a mother was oddly the most his endurance as a man had ever been challenged.

His parents fixed themselves some coffee without uttering a word. They were still just as much in shock over her sudden death as he was. They sat down at the kitchen table, sipping more on their own thoughts than their coffee.

“Jacob, we’ve been talking, and… You know, raising a child is… It’s just…”

His father broke in.

“We want to adopt her.”

Jacob sat silently in his chair, listening to them explode with rehearsed explanations.

“You know she’d be loved by us.”
“A little girl needs a mommy.”
“This is too hard for you to do on your own, son.”
“She needs to be taught girl things that only girls can teach.”
“Let us take this burden from you and…”

“Burden!” he shouted. If he hadn’t been holding a baby, he would have shot out of his chair.

“You think she’s a burden to me?”

He looked down at his daughter’s face as it was scrunching into a cry from his shouting.

“She’s all I have. A burden? She’s my world.”
“Son, I can understand how…”
“No, you don’t understand! You never will… Get out. Now.”
“Jacob, please…”
“Out! I’m serious. I need you to leave right now.”

His father stood up, glaring at him. After a pause they walked out the front door. Part of him wanted to call them back in, but he knew that was just the fear.

“Shhh, don’t cry, sweetheart. Don’t cry.”

She cried and cried for a mother who would never be there. The inability to explain to his daughter that her mother loved her made his chest ache. It would be years before she could understand.

He only hoped she would feel that he was there, and he wasn’t going to leave her. Ever.

 

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